Retro Review

RETRO REVIEW: Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones (2002)

Drew Struzan’s Release Poster – 20th Century Fox

Drew Struzan’s Release Poster – 20th Century Fox

The following is a retro review of Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones, a George Lucas film.

While I don’t love every film in the franchise, I clearly love Star Wars. I write about the franchise all the time. So while it is pretty obvious, it pains me to admit that The Phantom Menace wasn’t a good movie. I tried not to tear that film apart in my review of it.

I wanted to review this film right after reviewing The Phantom Menace, but, for some reason, it took me a very long time to finally muster up enough strength to write about this film. This review has been delayed for way too long. Let’s finally talk about the worst Star Wars film. (more…)

RETRO REVIEW: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part One (2010)

Poster - Warner Bros.

Poster – Warner Bros.

The following is a spoiler-filled retro review of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part One.

In Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part One, Harry Potter (played by Daniel Radcliffe), Ron Weasley (played by Rupert Grint), and Hermione Granger (played by Emma Watson) are unable to return to Hogwarts and, instead, go on the hunt for Horcruxes and ways to destroy them.
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RETRO REVIEW: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009)

Poster - Warner Bros.

Poster – Warner Bros.

The following is a spoiler-filled retro review of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

In Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Severus Snape (played by Alan Rickman) makes an unbreakable vow with Narcissa Malfoy (played by Helen McCrory) to protect Draco (played by Tom Felton), and fulfill his mission if Draco is unsuccessful. At Hogwarts, Harry (played by Daniel Radcliffe) finds a mysterious textbook with helpful notes that used to belong to someone known as the Half-Blood Prince. (more…)

RETRO REVIEW: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (2007)

Poster - Warner Bros.

Poster – Warner Bros.

The following is a spoiler-filled retro review of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

With the end of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Warner Bros. and Mike Newell made sure that we were ready to lose people. Cedric Diggory’s death was very sad, but it didn’t come close to being as devastating as what happened in David Yates’ Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. (more…)

RETRO REVIEW: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005)

Poster - Warner Bros.

Poster – Warner Bros.

The following is a spoiler-filled retro review of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.

After Cuarón’s excellent Prisoner of Azkaban, the Mexican film director left the franchise. The next man up, so to speak, was film director Mike Newell – known for Donnie Brasco & Four Weddings and a Funeral. Newell made a surprisingly fun film, considering Goblet of Fire was the first Harry Potter film to be rated PG-13. (more…)

RETRO REVIEW: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)

Poster - Warner Bros.

Poster – Warner Bros.

The following is a spoiler-filled retro review of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.

In Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Harry Potter (played by Daniel Radcliffe) finds out that Sirius Black (played by Gary Oldman) – a man who supposedly supports Lord Voldemort – has escaped Azkaban prison and is on his way to kill our protagonist.  (more…)

RETRO REVIEW: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)

Theatrical Release Poster - Warner Bros.

Theatrical Release Poster – Warner Bros.

The following is a spoiler-filled retro review of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.

In Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Dobby (voiced by Toby Jones) – a house elf – is trying to stop Harry Potter (played by Daniel Radcliffe) from reaching Hogwarts. At Hogwarts, a message has been written in blood: “Chamber of Secrets has been opened, Enemies of the Heir beware.”
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